Old Men in Sweats! TM
By: Tommy T. & Barry D.
Volume 20
URBAN MEYER NEEDS TO RESIGN IMMEDIATELY!
Urban Meyer has turned a messy situation downright filthy. Every time the superstar football coach speaks or tweets he shoves his foot deeper into his mouth. After his latest tweet today, stating that he was not suspended because of his failure to handle domestic violence, Ol’ Urban now has his foot knee-deep down his own throat. My goodness, it’s gotten so bad I am now asking myself “how can such a dumb-dumb make $8 million a year?” Because, I’m sorry Buckeye fans, but your coach is a complete moron. I don’t care how much money he makes or how many games he wins, that man is an idiot. Yeah a guy you never heard of just called one of the most decorated coaches in NCAA history a dumb-dumb, moron, and idiot in the same paragraph. Childish words for sure, but Urban has acted like an impetuous teenager who refuses to acknowledge any responsibility. So childishly, he should be treated.
From his first press conference on Big 10 media day on July 24 to his latest tweet today on August 31, Urban has only proven one thing to me. He is absolutely delusional and completely out of touch with any kind of reality in relation to the current sports landscape. Protecting a habitual wife-beater spanning two jobs over a ten-year period shows just how nuts the Ol’ ball coach is. Being an Old Man in Sweats, I remember when Buckeyes legend Woody Hayes finally lost all his marbles on the sidelines against Clemson in the 1978 Gator Bowl. Hayes punched Clemson linebacker Charlie Bauman several times in the face and head as his last act as Buckeye’s coach. Well, I won’t be surprised if the current Legendary Buckeyes coach does the same thing at some point this season.
Urban is just as out of touch today as Hayes was in the late 70s. After his press conference on August 22 when his 3-game suspension was announced, Urban never apologized to the victim in this case, Courtney Smith. He never once said, I regret what Courtney Smith and her children have had to endure from my assistant coach Zach Smith. Urban never said anything close to that. Then two days later he had to make an amended statement to try and save his rapidly eroding image. On August 24, Urban actually stole a page out of Tampa Bay QB Jameis Winston’s statement when he was suspended for grabbing an Uber driver’s crotch. Yes, Winston grabbed a woman’s crotch. Who does that? I don’t know anybody that would just reach over and grab a woman’s crotch. During Winston’s press conference he said, “I regret that I put myself in this situation.” Is that code word for “I’m sorry I grabbed that poor woman’s crotch?” But Ol’ Urban used Winston’s recycled apology in his own press conference. When asked specifically about Courtney Smith by a reporter, Urban replied, “I regret that I put everybody in this situation.” What? Come again? Did you just Jameis Winston us? Where do these sports figures learn how to apologize? And who is advising them on their statements? These have to be the worst PR reps in history.
Now Urban gets a 3 game vacation. I’m not going to call it a suspension. I’ts a vacation. The reporters should camp out in the Caribbean or Hawaii because I’m sure Urban will be getting off a plane at one of those tropical islands. A 3 game suspension? Now you’re just laughing at us Ohio State. I’m shocked this football coach still has a job anywhere. He literally protected his wide receivers coach, Zach Smith through his job at the University of Florida to his job at Ohio State University. All this for a wide receivers coach? Seriously? How hard could it be to find a wide receivers coach? Hell, my grandmother could be a wide receivers coach. It’s that easy.
The only sane thing I’ve seen out of this ugly situation is one of the board of trustees at Ohio State resigned today. The trustee Jeffrey Wadsworth claimed he pushed for a much harsher penalty. Note in this blog I have never referred to Urban as Coach Meyer because he doesn’t deserve my respect. From now on he’s Ol’ Urban, which is short for Urban the Clown. And I refuse to put THE in front of Ohio State University. Unless I can throw in another word and call it THE JOKE Ohio State University. That college and that coach are a joke.
We’re supposed to not stand for spousal abuse. We’re supposed to make an example of a “small” man who puts his hands on his wife and leaves bruises on her. We’re supposed to do the right thing. Whether were making $8 million a year and winning football games or whether were mopping floors for a living. Nobody gets a pass. Urban isn’t getting a pass from me. I hope he doesn’t get a pass from you!
-OMIS
OMIS: “PREACHING SPORTS KNOWLEDGE FOR A LIFETIME!”